Is someone getting the best of you…..

Why is PTSD such a stigma.

I see a therapist, big deal, want to fight about it? Nine times out of ten I will win. They talk about the Trauma we see as soldiers and it is 1000 times the “normal trauma” a normal person is supposed to see… Take that in, you see one dead body, its traumatic, your in one bad car crash, etc. A soldier infantry/ Ranger/ SOF soldier, sees one thousand times that of a normal person. I think of when I left the Military and I worked in the Cardiac Cath Lab/ ER and even then the loss the devastation of pumping someones chest so that they could get a balloon and a stent placed so that maybe some good ole fashioned ACLS will work. One time I was pumping a patients chest and the doc had the fluro on and said wait what is that. Sadly it was the shrapnel in my hand he hoped it was spontaneous re-profusion of the cardiac muscle.

Sadly the patient died, I was a marathon runner and so I was the guy called in on to pump chest because I had the strongest cardio of anyone available. So I watched outpatients come in and die for no reason, I watched outpatients come in kiss there wife’s goodbye and then all off a sudden we needed to get her to sign a surgery content while I was scrubbing in for surgery because it was after hours and they would die. The weirdest thing was blood did not bother money Ive stepped over blood of fallen comrades, and dead Iraqi’s/ Dead Tali/AQ and never thought twice about it. It took twice about it until I became a civilian.

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The kick VFW in Minnesota \. Proudly display old Glory.

I have become one of the best trained medics next to some of the guys that you already know. I worked my ass off for it. There were times Docs would kick nurses out of the room so that I could help/start Central lines. One Doc even said to me “Your Handy” as I helped him with his procedure. Starting chest tubes, intubating patients via retrograde intubation ultimately got me fired. When the DHS asked them why they fired me they called me a few days later they said we have never seen this before, they are not answering our calls. They knew they fired me for the wrong reasons, but what can you say.

I have worked the medical field to death, being burned so much you might as well call me crispy. Thats what happens when you put a well trained medic into a hospital. Bringing me back to my point if your seen one times more trauma than an average person, one thousand times more trauma than the average person. I rose my hand and swore an oath to defend this country against all enemies foreign and domestic…. The enemies domestic are the ones we see in the hospital. ITs us against there life!

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Ten days before m7 son ws born I ha da moth-lrrvel fusion. As promised the Div had my up walking around the dy my on was born/


Life is precious, if your a terrorist, then your gutless and deserve to die.  War is hell on our bodies, our minds, and our spirits….

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